CELEBRATE RECOVERY

Love & Relationship Addiction - Women

Bethlehem Church
Gastonia, NC
www.bethlehembc.com

Fridays 7 - 10 p.m.

LOVE & RELATIONSHIP ADDICTION - WOMEN’S GROUP

Love Addiction consists of three components: Romance, Relationship, and Sexual Addiction. We acknowledge all three as valid addictions. This group deals with Romance and Relationship Addiction only. Sex, can and usually does play a significant role in both of these other addictions. However, incorporating Sexual Addiction into this group would make it too broad and unfocused for us at this time.

ADDICTED TO “LOVE”: CHARACTERISTICS

Lack of nurturing and attention when young
Feeling isolated, detached from parents and family
Outer facade of “having it all together” to hide internal disintegration
Mistake intensity for intimacy
Hidden Pain
Seek to avoid rejection and abandonment at all cost
Afraid to trust anyone in a relationship
Inner rage over lack of nurturing, early abandonment
Depressed
Highly manipulative and controlling of others
Perceive attraction, attachment, and sex as basic human needs, on a par with food and water
Sense of worthlessness
Escalating tolerance for high-risk behavior
Intense need to control self, others, circumstances
Presence of other addictive or compulsive problems
Insatiable appetite in area of difficulty
Using others alter mood or relieve pain
Continual questioning of values and lifestyle
Driven, desperate, frantic personality
Existence of secret “double life”
Refusal to acknowledge existence of problem
Defining out-of-control behavior as normal
Defining “wants” as “needs”

SELF-CONTROL

There’s a struggle going on inside of us - a fight for control. Our willpower fails us repeatedly. Where can we turn when we realize that we can’t get control of our life? The apostle Paul said: “I advise you to live according to your new life in the Holy Spirit. Then you won’t be doing what your sinful nature craves. The old sinful nature loves to do evil, which is just opposite from what the Holy Spirit wants. And the Spirit gives us desires that are opposite from what the sinful nature desires. These two forces are constantly fighting each other, and your choices are never free from this conflict...But when the Holy Spirit controls our lives, he will produce this kind of fruit in us: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.” (Galatians 5:16-17, 22-23)

Self-control is not willpower. It is not something we get by gritting our teeth and forcing ourselves to “just say no.” Self-control is called a fruit. Fruit doesn’t instantly pop out on the tree. As the tree grows and seasons pass, the fruit naturally develops. As we continue to follow God’s guidance, taking one step at a time, our self-control will gradually grow. Our job is to stay connected to God. It is the Holy Spirit’s job to produce the fruit of self-control in our life.

Taken from the Life Recovery Bible

Romans 7:15 - 17 .....
“I don’t understand myself at all, for I really want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do the very thing I hate. I know perfectly well that what I am doing is wrong, and my bad conscience shows that I agree that the law is good. But I can’t help myself, because it is sin inside me that makes me do these evil things.”